Part III – Growth Together & Apart

By Adam and Brenda Weatherby

So, we have talked about hobbying together and the importance of time spent adventuring. We have also talked about letting your hunting journey as a couple evolve. Our tip for you this excerpt is to make sure you take the time to hunt by yourself or with others who are not your spouse. This is important because every hunter is on a different journey and has different priorities. For us, we always plan an epic hunting adventure together every fall, but we also plan a few hunts that are not with each other.

In 2016, Brenda had the opportunity to go to Africa on a women’s only safari. This provided her a chance to find some confidence in herself without Adam right by her side. She had to rely on others and her guides to be successful and she had the privilege of sharing the stories afterwards with Adam. This 10-day safari in the plains of Namibia was a powerful learning experience. With the plethora of game, there is less pressure to perform quickly. Literally, if you miss an opportunity, you will have plenty more. This also provides a plush experience in terms of accommodations and hospitality. A hot breakfast in the lodge puts you in great spirits as you head out for your morning hunt just as the sun is rising. Even if there is no harvest, you see so many herds of different animals. It is just breathtaking.

Brenda also appreciated the lessons of “Taking what the bush provides” and has taken that into her journey as a hunter. It is important for her to remember her main priorities: the experience in creation, the interaction with others, the accomplishment of a good shot and the reward of the harvest of meat. Trophy size has nothing to do with these goals. Now this does not mean that Brenda does not like to shoot a big animal but because of her experience in Namibia she approaches hunting a bit different. This is the part of her hunting journey that is only hers. If Brenda would not have had the opportunity to hunt without Adam, she may be a completely different hunter. Since 2016, Brenda has hunted with the girls for elk, antelope, and turkey. She will always consider Adam her favorite hunting partner, but she values the experiences without Adam as well.

Likewise, Adam goes on hunts every year where he has no limits to the adventure he wants to have. He can get up as early as he wants, hike as far as he wants and take on whatever challenge presents itself without having to always consider Brenda and maybe some of her limitations. This is healthy and something that just works. This past year, Adam went to the western side of Wyoming to find a mule deer and his goal was to shoot the biggest mule deer of his life. He put on 40 miles in three days with a couple buddies and eventually tagged a 32-inch-wide mule deer buck. The days were quite long, and the nights were a bit short. However, Adam’s intense focus on locating a big buck was exactly what he needed. It helped him to get his mind off work and just focus on the beauty of the outdoors.

So, while hunting is something we thoroughly enjoy together, we do believe it is important to schedule some hunting time apart as well. This also helps the two of us to not be gone at the same time for too many days in a season. After all, we also have a business to run and kids to raise. The simple fact is that we only have a limited amount of time that we can be in the field together and we want to take advantage of every one of those days.

There might also be certain types of hunts that one likes to do more than the other. Adam recently went goose hunting and Brenda and no desire to sit in a blind and freeze her butt off. Brenda has no problem saying that she does not hunt waterfowl. She could face pressure thinking that she “should” hunt everything. However, in her development she has grown in her confidence to know what she wants and does not want to hunt. We believe this is extremely important. When Brenda does not want to go on a hunt, she vocalizes it, and Adam has learned to not take her on something she is not comfortable with. This sort of mutual understanding and freedom to communicate needs is central to every hunting relationship!